Sistaz!

[webofevil]

“I don’t want to do this any more,” said one of my colleagues, a woman in her 50s, as we left the building. “I just want to spend my days riding my horse. But my husband doesn’t earn enough to keep me in the custom I’m used to.”

“Nice. Have you told him so?” I grinned.

“But that’s how it used to be,” she said. “We were always told, ‘Find yourself a rich man who can keep you’. I didn’t want any of that, I wanted to be independent. But as you get older... I should have gone to the south of France and shown myself off on the beach when I still had my looks. Far too late now. My daughter’s the same. She used to go out with [international UK rugby player]. Very tall. He used to fill my kitchen. She used to say, ‘But mum, he’s boring’. I’d say, ‘I don’t care. Stay with him!’. But she didn’t. She’s too much like I used to be. Still, she’ll learn.”

Comments

[moleintheground.livejournal.com]

[webofevil.livejournal.com]

I agree!

[moleintheground.livejournal.com]

[webofevil.livejournal.com]

No, I'm sorry, that's absolute rubbish.

[sleeperesque.livejournal.com]

[webofevil.livejournal.com]

If you say so.

[webofevil.livejournal.com]

Incidentally, I can't actually see these three comments at all, and am replying to them purely for rather limp comic effect. I think the LJ server is all better now, so if you want to repost, please do.

[sleeperesque.livejournal.com]

Oh I see! I thought you were being incredibly rude.

I said:

I know a lot of woman of think that way still, in this day and age. But I, for one, am happy to be a "kept" woman. It means I can visit people, paint, read books in the sun, dance through meadows etc without the stress of a career and the constant competitive nature of city folk.
The male suitor, however, would need to be pretty spectacular too though...I'm not settling for a dud.

[offensive-mango.livejournal.com]

I feel quite bad for men. You're expected to work to support somewhere between two and 10 (say) people for the rest of your lives, even if your wife works. There are very few women in the world who can keep *you* in the "custom you're used to," so there's not a lot of escape for most of you from that, if you want a relationship with anyone. And once you're in a relationship, you've got very little say about whether or not you want children (barring a vasectomy, which can be a relationship-ender anyway).

[chiller.livejournal.com]

*chalks one up for "Women who CAN keep you in the custom you're used to, and who are not going to spring children on you. Ever."*

Unfortunately, there don't seem to be guys who actually want that.

[chiller.livejournal.com]

Well, there probably are. But not the sort of chap I'd like to keep in the custom etc etc.

[offensive-mango.livejournal.com]

Hey, what's up with all the other comments here? They look blank to me.

[katstevens.livejournal.com]

They are clearly speechless.

[pageantmalarkey.livejournal.com]

There's pros and cons to it all (the being a woman or being a man thing). My body (yes, that old thing) means I never have to open a door for myself (provided there's a bloke about), however it also means I get shrieked at whenever I walk down the street unless I wear baggy jumpers and/or keep my hand locked firmly in Jon's (even this is sometimes not enough of a deterrent).

On the subject of supporting the other, I'd love to do this for Jon, but the favour will need reciprocating when I have to sprog.

[chiller.livejournal.com]

means I never have to open a door for myself

ZOMG really? I'm assuming you don't work in London, then?

[rhodri.livejournal.com]

Jenny just keeps buying lottery tickets in the vain hope that she'll never have to broach this subject with me, bless her.

[suzanne219.livejournal.com]

It would be nice to move towards a situation where men and women can be dependent on each other in different ways at different times in the life cycle, e.g. childbearing, illness, disability, old age etc. in a way that's not always gendered but depends on your circumstances etc.

Unfortunately, if women are stll the ones that give up work to have children for any stretch of time, and subsequently have crappy pension prospects, (and are on average paid less anyway,) then to a certain degree they will be dependent, either on a man's income or the state pension (as long as it exists.) And women are much more likely to be ill or disabled in old age and so men are perhaps more likely to be carers at that time. So maybe dependency will always be gendered.

I don't know what I'm saying, really- maybe that there should be ways of organising work and families so that men or wowmen can be supported at various times, but I am being a hopeless woolly hippy here.

I used to have easy answers for this kind of thing. I know nothing anymore!

[webofevil.livejournal.com]

> women are much more likely to be ill or disabled in old age and so men are perhaps more likely to be carers at that time

Statistically we're more likely to be dead by that point, mainly so that we can shirk caring duties.

[suzanne219.livejournal.com]

Yes, I was going to add that men are more likely to be carers "whilst they are still alive" but I didn't want to rub salt in it!

[yiskah.livejournal.com]

And women are much more likely to be ill or disabled in old age

Really? I thought it'd be the other way around.

[suzanne219.livejournal.com]

It's mainly because women live longer.

[monkeyssk8.livejournal.com]

when it says 'used to fill my kitchen', what is meant by that?

[webofevil.livejournal.com]

I know it sounds like unintentional filth, but she just meant that he was a very tall man in a very small kitchen.

[monkeyssk8.livejournal.com]

with a very long, ah nevermind!

[webofevil.livejournal.com]

... work surface?

[monkeyssk8.livejournal.com]

yes you dirty swine!

[lebeautemps.livejournal.com]

Rich brings you nothing except bitterness if you don't lurve yer man. You sit there wondering what intelligent pieces of work you could be missing.

And incidentally - that orange and black pic looks like it could be the motto of Fisters Fvckers UK. What is it?