Geogra-quiz

This finely honed piece of anticapitalist satire clearly expects me to recognise the country full of currencies being referred to by the alien sock-puppet thing, but I’m damned if I do. Do I have an American standard of map recognition, or is it actually not even a country at all?

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[Poll #1492286]

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He may just have become leader of UKIP but Lord Pearson hasn’t lost sight of what’s important: mentioning random animals to anyone who’ll listen.

Lord Pearson: If you are a sheep or a lemming you don’t join UKIP… I want UKIP to gum up the present political system completely so the monkeys can’t make any laws which we don’t want… The corrupt octopus isn’t going to turn into a cuddly teddy bear. [Times]

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A competition has begun to give members of the public the chance to design London's first official tartan. [BBC]

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Two rappers have been jailed for using an internet song to try to scare off witnesses to the murder of a 24-year-old man in Ealing, west London.

[The lyrics included:] “I can't wait for the snitch to drop, I still show up at his wake just to see him off”.

Old Bailey Judge Richard Hone said the lyrics meant: “Those who went chitter-chattering to police were themselves in danger of being shot.” [BBC]

I demand that from now on all rap lyrics be translated by members of the British judiciary.

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The 15-foot Christmas tree that was erected by the main entrance near Big Ben on Saturday toppled over first thing this morning and is still lying prone. Touchingly, they haven’t switched off the large star at the top, which is still twinkling forlornly. Sadly I can’t bring you any pictures of this because “no photos in the Palace of Westminster, sir”.