(no subject)

[webofevil]

Halibut freed in fish farm raid

Police are investigating a break-in at a fish farm which resulted in a large number of farmed halibut being released directly into the sea.

Strathclyde Police said that the farm near Oban, in Argyll, was targeted on Wednesday night or Thursday morning. Damage estimated at hundreds of thousands of pounds was caused as the cages containing the fish were opened.

Police say they do not know why the farm was attacked, but are checking if it was an animal rights protest. [BBC]

Bleeding-heart protesters? Hardly. It’s barely two weeks since the highest-profile fish assassination in recent history, the kind of operation that needs meticulous planning, and which may well have served as a signal to other fish around the world. I strongly suspect we’re now looking at the escape of its mastermind in this highly organised breakout from a top-security facility.

I’m afraid we must now brace ourselves for a wave of piscine terrorism. They could strike anywhere—all right, most likely near water—but my point is we won’t see them coming until the moment they launch themselves at us with watery cries of “Who’s sushi now?!” This is the real reason Russian trawlers have for so long been illegally hoovering up fish stocks in international waters—they’re used to dealing with terrorists in their own implacable way.

I urge you to be patient, vigilant and hungry. We will prevail in this new War on Tasty Terror.

Comments

[chiller.livejournal.com]

*licks lips and rubs a hand slowly over a perfectly round belly*

[chiller.livejournal.com]

Incidentally, have you tried saying "halibut freed in fish farm raid" out loud?

I've just had to reboot my tongue.

[webofevil.livejournal.com]

I just did, and the first thing I realised is that "Halibut Freed" sounds a lot like a detective. Abrasive, unconventional but he gets results, etc etc.

[chiller.livejournal.com]

He'll be in charge of clearing up that Steve Irwin business, I'll be bound.