(no subject)

[webofevil]

A couple of months ago, during particularly foul weather, I was battling across Westminster Bridge using my umbrella more as a shield, and consequently never saw the enormous puddle that was burst by a passing lorry and migrated entirely on to me. My top half was saved by the brolly, but it looked as if I'd jumped waist-deep into a swimming pool. It took me a fair bit of the day, and a remarkable amount of cursing, to dry off.

On Monday, thanks to a leaking water main, a narrow pavement and a spiteful bus, a similar thing happened. This time, though, I was quite grateful: it really was as refreshing on a hot summer's day as lame soft-drink adverts make out. Plus I'd dried out by the time I'd walked to work, and this time wasn't sat at my desk gently steaming.

Yesterday, though: officially Too Hot. What is it with this whole "sun" thing anyway? Surely there's a better way to provide light and heat to the entire planet.

Was woken at about 3.30am by the sheer airlessness of it all. Gave up on valiant rearguard action against consciousness at 5am and went to my local shop, which recently went 24-hour, to stock up on cold drinks. Discovered that it was a damn sight cooler outside, but the breeze was blowing in just the wrong direction for any of it to permeate my flat. If I'd had a garden, or indeed a workmen's cradle hanging outside my window, I'd have happily spent the rest of the night out in, or on, that. As it was I spent two hours slumped in front of breakfast TV, which confronts the sleep-deprived consumer with two basic options: cartoons or WAR. Worn out by both, I eventually stumbled back to bed and caught up on a couple hours' sleep. Thank God I don't usually have to be in work before midday, eh?

Comments

[webofevil.livejournal.com]

I told you before, I've got a room.

[ex-cornfedpi814.livejournal.com]

Get a broom.

[webofevil.livejournal.com]

I had to buy a new broom recently after my old, decent one broke. All I could find were cheapo outdoor brooms with sparse, hard bristles - pretty useless for, for example, a wooden floor, as they just tend to catapult the dirt around the place. "Have you got one with softer bristles?" I asked the guy in the hardware shop. He, clearly thinking this was some poncey Guardian-reading fad, disappeared into the back of the shop for five minutes and reappeared with a cheap outdoor broom with sparse, hard bristles that he had just spent five minutes attacking with something, to render them a bit softer.

In the absence of any choice, and in view of the fact that it was costing me about two quid, I bought it. It kind of works. Better than an unattacked outdoor broom, anyway.

[ex-cornfedpi814.livejournal.com]

This strikes me as a very 1950's solution.

[strictlytrue.livejournal.com]

So you have a room, and a broom.

Do you have a loom?

[webofevil.livejournal.com]

They didn't have any at John Lewis. I had to make do with a flume.

[pvcdiva.livejournal.com]

now that's what I call inventive customer service