Indulge me

[webofevil]

You know, it’s all too easy for us secular types to be cynical about religion, but it’s time we acknowledged that institutions can change with the times. No longer, for example, is the Catholic Church simply a repository of unbridled wealth and power maintained by peddling ridiculous superstitions to the credulous and vulnerable. Twenty-first-century faith is a sophisticated lifestyle choice, a rational sober decision, an intelligent response to the moral dilemmas and deeper questions posed by a complex world that—oh look, they’re giving away papal indulgences again. It’s a limited offer: get yourself to Lourdes some time in the next year and knock off some of the time you’re due to spend in purgatory. To celebrate the 150th anniversary of a young girl hallucinating an apparition of the Blessed Virgin Mary, you have an unrivalled opportunity to triumph over the Catholic Church’s cosmology thanks to the pope’s magic powers! Distance yourself from the horrific sadistic tortures of Hell dreamt up by weird ascetic medieval monks! Only the Church’s special blend of spells and incantations can preserve your eternal soul!

Sorry, where was I?


Remarkably, I have not photoshopped this picture. That is his nibs’s actual hat.