Mystery solved

[webofevil]

Tip: if you find yourself leaving the house and for no apparent reason suddenly feeling taller, in a mildly dizzying way reminiscent of being about 14 and returning somewhere after a few months to find that everything is mysteriously just that bit shorter than it was, and the feeling doesn’t in any way settle so that after 40 minutes of walking you’re concerned that you might be in the grip of a very gentle delirium that somehow doesn’t involve a high temperature, it might just be that when you took your fleece off earlier in the day without remembering to remove your glasses you bent them so that they were in a shape reminiscent of Nicole Kidman’s post-Botox eyebrows.

Should you ever have a burning need to feel slightly taller, however, this is a neat trick to remember.