Dec. 10th, 2009

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Right, so no-one else walking past this product has ever misread it as “Porn Pzazz”? No-one?

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Caring Lady Funeral Director bang next door to The Mans Shop? Ruth Madoc and Al Murray to star, commission x 12.

This is up there with the fact that in Mayfair there’s a “Spy Shop” located about three doors down from the “Counter-Spy Shop”, which surely leads to endless hi-jinks for all involved.
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Lord Selsdon on “the Commonwealth’s shared goals in democracy and development”:
Lord Selsdon: In the debate on the Queen’s Speech I made certain suggestions. I have learnt in your Lordships’ House that if you want to get anything done at all it takes 10 to 15 years, like some good wines. So I have used what I call the “rule of thumb”. It is extremely useful. If you want to know where you are when you are sailing with a rather bad map, you put your thumb on the coastline and stay outside the width of your thumb. If you want to know where and how deep to plant things on land, wherever it may be, you stick your thumb in the ground. If you want to know how far away you are from other people—for example, from the noble Lord, Lord Luce, although I am not allowed to gesture in your Lordships’ House—you hold up your thumb and shut one eye, and you will see that it will move to the right. You work out how many fingers that is, and that will tell you how far offshore you are.

The theme I want to adopt today is to state further that when you look at the Commonwealth, you should first of all look at it from space. (etc)[Hansard]
Immediately after the words “how offshore you are”, the camera in the chamber cut to the aforementioned Lord Luce just as he said very clearly to the Peer next to him, “Is this relevant?”

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